Ramadhan is here and this means that Hari Raya is about a month away. i like Ramadhan, i like fasting... it gives me a sense of peace and tranquility within me. think it must be the goodness of the month. well, this year, i plan to cook more. (so that we can eat at home instead of breaking fast outside!) So far so good, but a little tiring cos i need to get up earlier to cook. but i'm happy. cooking is a good way to bond with your husband. he'll do all the cutting and preparing drinks, i'll handle the cooking part. and we share the workload of the aftermath- cleaning up! yikes! and good news, i havent felt lethargic at all during work. this is good. now, i'm planning what to cook this whole week. its so exciting you know... and NATAS fair is coming really soon... spain or italy?
these past 1 1/2 week has been quite hellish for me.. so much so that i feel i am falling into a depression or something. It all started when 'someone senior' mentioned something abt me. (won't say exactly what happened here here cos i don't wanna be accused of slandering or something.. haha!) Anyway, it really hurts... really really hurts inside. I don't know why i reacted that way. I kept thinking abt it until i've got migraine for 2 days and need to go to the doc's. I feel so depressed. My husband, poor thing, gotta listen to my cries and woes, until friday when i just fell ill... migraine.. and need to be in bed, shut out from all sounds and light source... depressing. Am i too sensitve? I don't know. So far, I'm opened to criticisms, taking them like a pinch of salt... I guess this one is a real blow bcos of the way other pple handled it. I feel that all my efforts so far are all gone wasted... down the drain. How dare he said such a thing about me! And he has no right to judge me in that way cos he doesnt even work with me! Only on that particular event, he's just not happy at the way i execute my plan... and to think that one my close colleagues ( my senior) actually believed what he said! She is like my mentor and knows me and my working style and i've always put work first... sigh. so sad. and the way she mentioned this matter to me. so casual yet, 'right in the face'. i was stumped. The few days after that, I feel that i cannot go on working in such a backstabbing environment. Why put in so much effort, when it just take one occasion like this to ruin it? This guy is like the most coward person i know! Cos he didnt dare to tell it my face! I have had many unpleasant experiences at work before but this is just too much! After much thinking, i realised that why should i be so strssed abt this. I must be strong and carry on what i think its best for me.
well, for those of u who tried calling / sms me last sat, you would notice that my handphone is switched off... yes, for the first time in like 8 years or so, i've made myself uncontactable from anyone for 24 hours!!! why? well, i think i need the peace and quiet. Ppl from work keep calling me! And its a sat u know! I need my rest! huh! well, anyway, i had the best time just lazying ard at home, on my bed, in my airconditioned room, sleeping... zzzzzzzzzzzz....... wonderful, divine beauty nap.... then i decided to swtched on my handphone at 10pm and guess what? 14 unread messages, inbox full... wow... can't believe it but its true..... and out of these, 8 are work related. what else can i say?
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